I don’t pray. It seems pointless to send a request to a higher power and then sit back and hope it comes through. It either will or it won’t, but not because a mythical power listened to my plaintive voice amongst billions and decided it was my lucky day.
But I’m going to make an exception here. I need to pray for some answer, any answer at all that I can actually believe, for what to do about my back. It hurts. It isn’t getting better. I’m not riding. All of the hard work I’ve put in is slipping away. The physical therapy seems to be increasing the pain. The answers I get are all vague and suggest interminable waiting. I can’t wait any longer. I’m losing my mind and the pain just continues to gnaw at me. It ebbs and flows, changes places and depth, sometimes bites or grabs me when I least expect it, but it never stops. I know that it could be worse, I’m lucky, etc. Fine. Whatever. But my whole heart is in riding and training and being on a bike, and I can’t do that right now and I just need a better answer.
So please. Help me out here.
I’ve been following your blog for a while now and I’m excited for you to get to the Olympics, so this news is just a kick to the groin! I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I went through something similar after a fall on some single track, the pain was so bad that I swear if the painkillers weren’t so damn controlled I would’ve been sucking them down a handfull at a time, worst three months of my life! You have my sympathy, but it will get better. I don’t pray as a rule, but I’ll make an exception for you, goodluck!
Dear Ms Field, The peaks of victory must sometimes come with the valleys of defeat. I’m sorry to hear about your current valley. Hopefully it will make the view from the next peak more beautiful. That probably didn’t help, but as your loyal reader I felt a need to prod you onward.
that sucks so much worse than anything i’ve ever been through with regards to being sidelined from riding due to illness or injury. (not to mention i’ve no aspirations of being/going pro)…
the other night i had a panic attack, true blue panic attack, & later realized i hadn’t been on my bike in a few days…i need it for my mental health, especially this time of year. whenenever depression or anxiety starts to get the best of me, i can usually trace it back to the fact that i simply need to get on my bike. stat.
so, with that, i’m just sorry…i’m sorry you are going through this.