On deciding to retire

Posted on by Lindsay
The first thing I did after deciding to retire was spin for an hour on the trainer. Of course that’s how it would go. I decided to retire; I didn’t stop breathing or being a head case. But I should back up. In early June of 2007, I bought a mountain bike and later that month, I started racing it. By August, I’d decided I wanted to go to the Olympics for cross country racing and by the following December, I was in training. My whole life shifted: my diet became healthier and actually included water, I rode a bike all the time, and every day included some type of cross-training. Sometimes I loved it; others I’d put off training all day and throw tantrums as I dragged myself onto the trainer at 10pm. How I felt about the process was mostly irrelevant – I had a goal and absolute tunnel ...continue reading.

So you want to be a pro cyclist.

Posted on by Lindsay
One of the best things about this past racing season was no longer constantly worrying about signing my next professional contract. When you run your own cycling team, you worry about everything except whether or not you’ll have a job. Jono and I did have a conversation about this few months ago. “You’re hiring me as a rider again,” I said. “You don’t have a choice.” “I could say no, but then you could fire me. And we haven’t talked about whether or not you’re hiring me back as the director.” And so that was settled. After five years of stressing all season about getting a job the following year, it was a relief to let go of that concern and race my bike without thinking about a result on a resume. [Instead I worried constantly about the team getting results to keep the sponsors happy and the team in existence. No pressure.] ...continue reading.

That time I was swept away by a tsunami of man and bike

Posted on by Lindsay
Hello from the off season! Everything is going really well here. Wait, no. That is a lie. Much like every road in the city of Seattle, things are continually up and down. Sometimes life is peachy and I'm living the dream and other times I would very much like to wake up already, damnit. That shift usually occurs several times before noon each day. I went on a great ride last week. By great I mean "possibly, if not likely, the worst ride of my entire cycling career" but in retrospect it was at least memorable. My training plan called for a three-hour endurance ride and, because my legs were crap and I was exhausted, I decided to plan a chill ride exploring West Seattle for several hours. No pressure, no big efforts, just some quality time on the bike seeing the town. Then it rained. It was very windy by ...continue reading.

On Handling Bad Times Like A Pro Or Something

Posted on by Lindsay
Things have been unraveling since I slammed into the ground during the first North Star Grand Prix crit on June 15. When the crash happened and I was cleared by the hospital and the stage was neutralized, I went back into the race the following day like nothing had gone wrong. I did that stage and all the others after it, limping along stubbornly and pushing my body so hard. There was no logic in what I was doing but I couldn't stop and wouldn't let anybody around me say otherwise. That mindset is my greatest gift and curse as an athlete - I never stop. But I should have. Then, or in the days after, but I didn't. I tried to race and then started another cross-country drive out west. I called that drive my "time off" but who the hell is ridiculous enough to think driving 5-6 hours a ...continue reading.

In which I uprooted my life and moved into my car

Posted on by Lindsay
I'm sitting in a stranger's living room now, doing my laundry in his washer with my feet up on his ottoman. I've never met the guy before but I'm going to sleep in his bed tonight and go through his cabinets to find a pot to boil water in the morning. After breakfast, I'm going to pack up my things, get in my car, and relocate for the weekend to another city I've never visited. This is basically my every day. Tonight it's Cory's house, last night it was Chelsie's, for a week before that it was Ayman's, before that it was Angie, and Alice, and Gretchen and so on. The year started with me living in a studio in Tucson that I was subletting from a guy I never met named.....David? Michael? Can't recall. But for three months, I used his dishes and sheets and towels, lounged on his ...continue reading.

In like a lion, out like a lamb

Posted on by Lindsay
The final stage of the North Star Grand Prix - the Stillwater Criterium with its famous 18% grade up Chilkoot Hill - wrapped up just a few hours ago, although my day ended even a little before that. After a rocky start to the stage, I did what I could to help the team and was then pulled unceremoniously by the officials. It didn't really matter; we'd accomplished what we set out to do in keeping Sophie Mackay in the Sprinter's Jersey. But it's still never easy to accept personal defeat. I had high hopes going into this race last Wednesday. My form has been good, it was my final event before a much needed mid-season break, and I was ready to step up and earn some results. There was a frightening episode with my heart right before the time trial start, but I raced anyway and was thrilled to earn a ...continue reading.